now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think weed is turning my hair brown
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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