She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize