I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
