I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
