low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
