Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(865): View more from Tennessee

we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door

(865): View more from Tennessee

and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice

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(631): View more from New York

there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.

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(850): View more from Florida

Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me

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(989): View more from Michigan

I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.

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