Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i think i have two assholes
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
