the day after is always just damage control
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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