is your mom at the bar?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize