So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
