Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
