Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
