i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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