Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
