well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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