Sponge bath it is.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
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