My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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