I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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