but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Randomize
