yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
