Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
