so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
