She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
