Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
