In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just want to make out with him forever
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize