BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
