Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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