I just saw a hot homeless man
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
