Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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