she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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