is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
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