11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
