What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
