..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
