Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize