he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize