I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
