Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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