he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
