she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
