we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
