okay pat passed out under dana's car
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
