i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
