I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
