so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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