There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
