i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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