I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
