Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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