wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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